"By the Order of the Crown"

I've been instructed by an Officer of the Court to publish what I have witnessed.

"It HAS to be publicised!"

Welcome to my candidate's statement:

all of 17 letters and two periods.
(I chose the name to be instructive)
"I own and control it"

Geoffrey Mangers
Candidate for Chapter Coordinator of Northern California CHADD

"because we have difficult issues to argue and need organisations representing us with the Coin of Integrity that rings true with the public"

Learn more about me at: www.mangers.org

CHADD's Bylaws stipulate that control of their Chapters stems from it's membership.  And not 'the other way around'.  I wish to encourage other members of good will and good character to contest me in the upcoming election.  I do not seek to win it.

 Table of Contents


(from the Hon. Zoe Lofgren)

"I've got letters .."  I replied to her Chief of Staff (indicating my folder full of them on her conference table) ".. you want to see their Bylaws?"  She just smiled.  In fact, she just smiled through it all..


"What's New":

"Welcome Geoffrey and good luck with the election"

An Incomplete Chapter Financial Report 
~ A mysterious bank account(s).  How much?  A million?
Where did it come from?--"chapter bake sales"?
~ Where did that $50,000 go last year? 

Conflict of Interest  (5/2/05)

This is NOT about CHADD's published message (6/3/05)

What the hell is "the Santa Clara County Bar Association"?  (6/3/05)



Why, a Treasurer could wind up in a state of Hysteria from it all.

"Where can I announce my candidacy!", you excitedly ask?
I have no idea.



"It HAS to be publicised!"

Was it "HAS" or "MUST"?  I like to quote people correctly (but my email seemed to bounce the last time).  I originally thought it was 'MUST' (but that was 2 years ago).  Anyway, it's intensity really impressed me at the beginning of that phone call as soon as I mentioned my Candidacy.  Before I even had a chance to ask for a copy of their Election Bylaws.  That's one electoral savvy lady I thought to myself, undoubtedly highly perceptive with a sharp and quick thinking mind.  Someone who already knows how Incumbents easily win using "vote picking" in an election with a Confidential membership.  And is now moving quickly and instinctively to protect her Integrity,  By ensuring my candidacy is published to the membership in a timely and expedient manner so as not to be accused of either ignoring it completely, or waiting until the last minute to do so.  Someone of obvious keen intelligence.  Hearing the trumpet call of the will of the membership about to sound announcing the contest of an election.  And as a savvy Incumbent politician, is wisely "stepping back" and bowing before it.  Sensing the challenge that lay ahead, by first and above all, protecting her Integrity.



In "the Service of the Court" (proudly)

"How may I help you sir?"

They are the words you hear from someone who sees you have spent far too long in the noonday sun as you stumble out of a desert after 3 years of thirsting.  Having become (like Diogenes thirsting for an honest man) delusionally ill from it all.


Please note:
 This is NOT about CHADD's published message. 

Like the message of wrongfulness one sees in many commercials showing starving children requesting everyone to send money lest they perish.  My heart goes out to these children and I hope that all of the money that is sent all goes to help.



When and where will the elections be held?

"Please give me more of an explanation of what is happening for and during this election picture."
I have no idea, I told this member.

Anyone know who the Nominating Committee not running for office is in this election?  Should I be appointing one?  Or when this election will be published to the membership?  Or where it is?  I don't.  Anyone heard from our "election team not running for office" in our last election yet?  Or the previous one?  Did I win any of them?  Or both of them?  Will I be required to step down this year?  Anyone seen any Bylaws (with their approvals)?  Are there any?  

Has my candidate's statement been published to the membership yet?  Will it ever be?  Does anyone know who I am yet?  

What's in our Treasury?  Who owns that Risograph?

"I'm unable to answer your questions.."





 Who controls CHADD? 

Did their "restructuring" in '99 remove control from their membership in contravention to their 501(c)(3) Bylaws?

  Standards and Responsibilities for Chapters: II-C-7

"The maximum term of office for a Coordinator is 2 consecutive years. 
After this time the Coordinator must step down" 


Are they authentic?
Are they binding and currently in force?

"Lew took office as Coordinator of CHADD NorCal on November 6, 1999."

Mick Terrone
Director of Membership and Chapter Services  



Chapter Policy Formation II-B
"CHADD National Bylaws, Standards, and Policy supercede all Chapter Policy."




This is chaddnorcal.COM

I own and control it.  I chose the name to be instructive.  Anyone can throw up a website and say whatever they wish on it.  For instance, I could announce I won our last two Elections against Lew on this website.  But it would be untrue.  Election results are not found on a website run and controlled by an Incumbent but from an Election Commission (or e.g. "Election Team").  Of which none are allowed to be running for office in the Election they control.  And they must know and be competent to uphold their Election Bylaws.  There is a very important reason for this.  Which I have found instructive.

Lew Mills Ph.D. owns and controls www.chaddnorcal.ORG
I've run against him twice now.

I am Geoffrey Mangers.  Learn more about me at www.mangers.org 
This is my story about CHADD that I joined in the Fall of 2000.  And why I've been running against Lew.  Who I found to be charming and warm.  I hope to find him again so in the future.  And wiser.


(kinda a "work in progress" .. it will look a bit confusing for awhile .. hope to complete it 'eventually' .. "stay tuned" .. G.M.)

  "and thanks to all my supporters .. I couldn't have done it without them"  



With over 700 paid members here:

The 2003 contested election held on July 12 was attended by only one voting member not running for office.  And she (a Notary Public, btw) was completely ignored and still hasn't been allowed or asked to give us the election results yet.

And the last election June 19, 2004 was attended by NO voting MEMBER not running for office
(indeed, even our Notary Public there cancelled out at the last minute).  




Table of Contents


"Start here"

And I have as yet had no explanation from anyone for ANY of it:
"didnít even take the time to get to know who I was"


 The Bylaws of Confusion 

Geoffrey's Complaint about Confusing Emails
(or "maybe it's me" so"pardon my Asperger's--I'm confused")

In Her Majesty's Service (proudly)..


 "By the Order of the Crown"

"My work is over.." I shrugged.
"Oh no..!" and was intructed to publish what I had witnessed.



(It's an interesting diagnosis)

Wear it proudly

"..but if mommy had written a letter to her congressman.."
(thanks for the suggestion)

Election Team 2005
"Dear Dr. Stubblefield.."

An open letter to CHADD's CEO 1/4/05
Announcement of Candidacy and my Candidate's Statement
And questions.

The Silence of CHADD's CEO

An Incomplete Financial Report
"You've had enough!"

Confidential Membership = a Permanent Incumbency

(it is sometimes desirable, but an organisation should be honest about what it is and how it portrays itself to the public and its members)

Why is it so tenacious?
Conflict of Interest

"Because it is my Therapy"
(why I'm doing all this)

"The Air of Familiarity"
"Say 'hi' to Clarke Ross for me"

"The Silence of Novartis"
The Questions I sent to Gina
(that were never answered)

My comments on the last (2004) Election

The CHADD Election (2004)

My election speech 
(I never gave, it seemed fruitless to do so)
"What do you have?" I appealed sadly to them instead
"Where's the membership?"


Announcement of 2004 Candidacy


Strange Dream Dept.

A Parable on Communication 

"swimming in a Sushi tank"

"A Walk in the Night Air"

"The Stix School Library" 




 Election Team 2005 

  Dear Dr. Stubblefield.. 

 of the Highest Caliber 


"..the drawing up of the blueprints.."
Call for Applicants to sit upon it.
  Only those committed to Honest Elections need apply 

proven Ethical Abilities required
"laying the foundation"




  An open letter to CHADD's CEO 

Announcement of Candidacy: 2005
My Candidate's Statement†
Questions on CHADD's Property†
Who won the last 2 Elections?

"Col. Mustard with the Risograph in the Library" 
"It's in my garage!"

I announced my candidacy again to their CEO.
But I'm still trying to get those election results.
I need to know if I'll have to step down this year.
And any property I've been in custody of to turn over.

CHADD's Risograph.  
Is this it? Risograph (new, this was $16,000)
I've never seen it: "who owns it?"
"why is it so tenacious?"

I now wish to see authentic proof of CHADD's lawful ownership of it.
And its chain of custody since its purchase.

I sent this letter directly to Clarke Ross himself, certified and restricted delivery to him personally on 1/4/05.
Dear Dr. Ross..
Sheila Faison's signature (dated 1/10/05) is on the return receipt I received 1/18/05.  

The Silence of Clarke Ross

Ruth Hughes, PhD: "I'm unable to answer your questions..".  (1/12/05)
Why didn't she just say something like "our comptroller has no record of our Northern California Chapter's ownership of a Risograph".



"Start here"

"In Her Majesty's Service (proudly).."

And I have as yet had no explanation from anyone for ANY of it:
"didnít even take the time to get to know who I was"

"Plebiscites": is it ALL appointed now? -- "Who controls CHADD?"

I announced my candidacy March 2, 2003.  Against Mike.  And was ignored.  What we were told were 'elections' the previous years, turned out to be 'plebiscites'.  When it was cancelled June 4 at Susan Kloss' lecture, I announced my candidacy publicly for Lew's office.  He faxed me the Bylaws the next day.  That removed him from office.  

And now their lawyer was on my doorstep.

"Inattentive" -- "very believing" (easily deceived).  Easily spooked.  And frightened into silence:

"keep it in the family"  (we know this one, eh?)

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For everyone:  if a lawyer ever tells you this, you tell everyone you know what's just been done to you.  


This was the first time I had ever received communication like this from a lawyer and they knew I was naÔve and would be vulnerable to it.  From a lawyer, it implies the threat of a lawsuit.  This was done to a naÔve Inattentive.  "We don't need a lawsuit" is what one hears ("another suppression").  Thatís how it's done.  How people are silenced.  And it's so easy to do to an Inattentive.  I had been "bouncing off the walls" from it all.  And was all alone with it.  But I knew I had to stand up to it:

It was just plain Wrong.  I was steeling myself for a lawsuit (and I am again).  I was scared:

"Right and Wrong"--we call it Integrity.  

It's when they know what they're doing is wrong: "..but if mommy had written a letter to her congressman.."  .. you know, that was a good idea.  Thanks.  Perhaps he himself has been deceived and 'coached' or trained in this ("where does it all end?").  And is just another pawn.  Scapegoat.  But if not, then they are still responsible for him.  Because he was appointed by them.  

"Who controls CHADD?" -- the question I now have is "where does it all end?" 
Or maybe it's "when?".  For it all just "rolls on" obliviously.


And there's NO excuse for ANY of it.
"didnít even take the time to get to know who I was"






It's your ADD "Red Badge of Courage"
Wear it proudly. 





It's an interesting diagnosis (rare in men 1:5).


"Absent-minded professors", "daydreamers", "off-in-the-clouds..", passivity, wimps--we're not known for our 'heroics'.  Do not expect it of us.  Neurologically, we're not built or made of that stuff.  It can't be overcome.  It's "how we are".  ADD-ers in general are "easily spooked"--that Hypersensitivity--'thin skinned' everything hurts.  Hypers (hyperactive types) defend themselves (you'll probably hear from them if they're upset or spooked).  But not Inattentive's, we internalise it.  "No one knows" (as we suffer silently, alone with it).  Rabbits: they don't cry out when they're in pain.  We're easily beaten down and run and hide from contention.  Assertion (that "pro-active" thing) can become an enormous struggle for us (even more so with depression).  We're 'wimps' (that hypersensitivity): "easily spooked" and dominated into submission.  Ultimately, you can't win over a dominating personality or environment (on the distaff side, some think they can handle it: "survivor" .. "strong woman" they tell me.  "Then why do you have such an extensive history of being abused?" I find myself starting to think to myself).  Survival is about surrounding yourself with Health.  "Surround yourself with the Best and the Brightest"

Hallowell: "you can't do this ADD thing alone, I had help".

Hypersensitivity: we're "easily bruised".  And "knocked down for the count".  We need those who know how to do the constant 'bandaging'--(it is in fact, I expect, a rare skill).  Help us 'ventilate' that obsessive negative ideation, build our self-esteem and fill us with energy and hope (to "jump back in that ring each time").  A sense of Humor can be invaluable.

Inattentive's (especially with depression) constantly have to struggle with that assertiveness and "pro-active" thing .. "social isolation" (especially with that low self-esteem).  We need constant encouragement and lots of cheerleaders.  And "we need it every day" until it holds true.

It's been interesting to learn about ("what I think is my") ADD.  So much of it is simply getting the Environment right.  It's odd, I've probably "known it all my life".  But the first time I had ever heard it put into words was at the last Hallowell lecture I attended a year ago here (Palo Alto 5/13/04).  Environment is a kind of a codeword I suppose.  It is not actually often defined.  "What has your environment been telling you?"  ..  "Inattentive"--"very believing".  Have you been hearing that you are a "failure"?--this is not a healthy environment.  "Inattentive" ("very believing")--you may not even realise it.  
  At his lecture, he said to look around you.  For example, is there domination in it?  In effect, "is it bringing you health? .. helping you to blossom".

I've learned that there are certain environments that are unhealthy for people with ADD.  And it is wise, if possible, to avoid them.  For instance, organisations and people that are controlling and deceptive.  For we are easily abused and (being socially isolated) vulnerable to capture and exploitation by them.  We are Canaries, so to speak, of our environments (for we can easily perish when it becomes toxic) and need to find those that bring us Health.  Strengthen us and build our self-esteem.  And keep us Healthy.  Encourage and help us to truly blossom and not exploit, demean or suppress us.  Where we are treated with respect.  Listened to.  And told what is right with us, not what is wrong with us.  And, by example, taught healthy lessons.  Integrity, for instance.  We need to be taught to recognise when we are being deceived.  Or abused.  And how to defend ourselves and be assertive.  For our passivity can easily become an invitation for predation as we "do as we're told" waiting patiently for our turn that never comes.  We will need those to help and support us in learning the skills of assertion.  And assertiveness training is never considered successful until one usurps the authority of the instructor.  

Inattentive: "easily controlled" .. very trusting and believing.  We are easily misled by others defining our world for us.  We must persist with socialisation (we will need help to do so), for we need the comparisons to know what is right (there can be some real subtleties to this one!).  The heterogeneity of socialisation is our only protection.

Anyone and any organisation involved in working with people with ADD must be of the highest Character.

"Surround yourself with the Best and the Brightest"



An Incomplete Financial Report


A Hidden Bank Account (a million dollars?)
Where's the Risograph?
What expenditures did that $50,000 go for?
Could other items be missing?

I'm publishing the only chapter financial report I've ever seen since joining in 2000, because it is incomplete, confusing and missing significant critical expenditures.  As well as property items.  Particularly that Risograph.  And glaringly missing, a bank account(s).  A treasury possibly approaching a million dollars.

Chapter Finance Report (page 1)
Chapter Finance Report (page 2)
Chapter Finance Report (page 3)


"Inattentive" -- we miss it all the time.

I initially skimmed it at our last 2004 Election seeing $25K and thinking "small potatoes" (figuring it's probably used to fly out all their branch coach leaders to attend their annual national conventions).  I've looked at it more carefully recently.  That was only a half year's "Net Income".  Actually, I was looking for that Risograph.  And then I saw it "right in front of my face".  Almost a year later.  I couldn't believe what I was looking at:

Bank Interest: $16,193.09 (6 months: 1/1 - 6/16, '04) that places a yearly total around $32K.

"interest on what?"

At current bank interest rates, that means something like A Million Dollars belonging to the chapter membership floating around in some bank account(s) somewhere.  And unaccounted for.  "What's going on?"

Here's an interesting expenditure: 'INK'
"Ink for what?"  the Risograph?--"who owns it?"

Property owned by the membership can have a tendency to slip into private hands.  Thatís why CHADD's Bylaws (also hidden from its membership) require its declaration to the membership in its annual financial statement.

Standards and Responsibilities for Chapters: II-D-3,4

3. Fiscal responsibility will be reported to the membership by way of an annual financial report submitted to the CHADD National Office by July 30th each year. The report must include an inventory of items, which the Chapter and its Branches own, such as fax machines, filing cabinets, books, videos, etc.

4. Annually, the Chapter's financial report is to be distributed to the membership, and a copy sent to the Controller. (Financial reporting forms may be obtained from the Controller).

Without a newsletter (I've never seen one since I joined in 2000), this all becomes hidden.  Even more questionable with a 'ghost' membership.  Members that come once, twice and never return.  It becomes an organisation without a History.  Why isn't the leadership motivated to hang on to them?  What's their real interest in that constant influx of naÔve new members?  Do they really want them hanging around at meetings?  For a few years..?  By the way, I'm learning there's big money in ADD.  Take 'coaching' (typically over $100/hr).  After 3 years, the constant commercials become a bloody bore:

I've heard it at more meetings than I care to remember.  Dominance is quickly established usually starting in the lobby as new members arrive "I'm the Coordinator".  And repeated perhaps several times lest there be any doubt and at the beginning of every meeting.  Perhaps reinforced by another CHADD officer present who also suppresses any questioning of this or other dissent.  Or discussion of the elections should it occur.  "Inattentive"--"easily dominated".

Then the inevitable commercial sometime during the meeting .. ah yes, 'the benefits of coaching'.  Ending with the smiling boasting satisfied customer himself: "I'm a Coach" boasts "I'm the Coordinator" to a captive audience.  And "never worry" for there's a new crop born at every meeting.  "Inattentive"--"very believing".  My father was.  He was constantly looking for help too.  And (like me, poor also) found out real quick what they were all about.  I remember the "cleared out" jokes after one in particular ("hang on to your bank account").

The self-help movement has been my therapy.  And all I've ever been able to afford.  It is precious to me.




I thought Dr. Stubblefield said it rather well during his last CHADD lecture I attended a year or so ago.  Like Dr. Jasuja, he did not stand at the lectern either.  But instead, sat down among us all.  Perhaps he was 'clearing the air' to allow one of us Inattentive's to speak.

Indeed, I myself had intended to announce my candidacy at his meeting but never did.  I remained silent for another reason.  For I was impressed with some spirited remarks in a point he was making on our behalf to a colleague who needed to hear it.  And did not wish to stir up any more troubled waters.  For I agreed with what he had said.  I said nothing and did not stay late.

But this was not his colleague (or me) he said it to.  I wish he had been at that Chatterbox meeting to help me out:

"You've had enough!"

We Inattentive's aren't very good at that assertiveness thing.  Waiting patiently for our turn that never comes.  Thanks for showing me how to do it, Dr. Stubblefield.



 Confidential Membership = a Permanent Incumbency

How it is done: "vote picking" (don't know what else to call it offhand).  It's very subtle, but it's so easy to do.  I myself wasn't aware of it until my first election campaign.  It's been quite an education for me at any rate.

"Get out the vote"--you can't.  When a membership is Confidential.  
Here's how Incumbents easily win:

"Vote picking"

In elections with historically low turnouts (in our case "no turnout"), an Incumbent (who also controls the entire election) simply picks off from a large (e.g. 700) Confidential membership list (known only to him and hidden from a challenger) a few sympathetic to him (just enough to 'tip the balance' in his favor) .  And has them show up at the election to sway it on his behalf.

And it's so easy to ignore a Candidacy which is why:

"It MUST be publicised!"

Our treasurer knew it.  What I also learned is that a candidacy becomes a public disclosure.  And I've just realised why no therapist has ever told me directly that I have it (they generally won't).  If someone I do not wish to discuss it with asks me if I've ever been diagnosed, I can tell them that.  I can also say "I don't know" or "I'm not sure".  Or "what is it?" (heh-heh-heh) they don't know.  I've never been Hyperactive.  It's a spongy diagnosis anyway.  The public sure has a lot of misconceptions about it (the media isn't helping..). I had to go online and research it to find out.  Most therapists don't know how to diagnosis all the variations anyway (unless theyíve really kept up in the field .. I've learned the good ones are grateful for the 'update').  BTW, I always like to ask speech therapists how to deal with my 'b' blocks.  Only one, Peter Ramig, ever gave me the right answer, totally and completely.

Confidential Membership List  -- it's so easy to ignore a Candidacy: "Vote picking"
It becomes a Permanent IncumbencyThat's why the strict 2-year term limit is so important.  And why Bylaws are important.  And their Knowledge by the membership.


Why is it so tenacious?
In our stuttering support groups, elections (in my experience) have never really been a big issue.  No one wants to do all that organisational work anyway (I've done it before, I know what it's all about).

Then "why is it so tenacious?"

"and now a word from our sponsor.."  
(ah yes, 'the benefits of coaching', ending with)
"I'm a Coach" boasts "I'm the Coordinator"
(maybe it's in their training manual or something..)
It never happened when Lisa was around: "Where's Lisa?"

("Say 'hi' to Clarke Ross for me" .. we were instructed to go along with it)
Conflict of Interest..

(It's endemic in our society.  And often difficult to eliminate entirely.  Sometimes it's benign.  When I see it, I want to see something healthy.  Or at least normal.  But this is "off-the-charts".  An organisation that has no interest in its membership or maintaining one.  In fact, members who 'hang around' and begin to communicate privately with each other can (when elections occur) contest the incumbent 'Hierarchy' whose primary interest is in that continual stream of naÔve new faces: "Easy Pickens" (as soon as Lisa left the recruitment started: I was, but like my father had no money for it).  Maybe it's all just some big coaching business or something.  And absolutely nothing is ever done about it.  As it all just "rolls on" obliviously)

And then there's that Risograph.  Who owns it?

In any event, elections (honest ones) always bring Health to an organisation and its leadership. They serve the dual purpose of legitimising and strengthening leadership as well as returning control back to the membership.



Conflict of Interest

"I'm a Coach" boasts "I'm the Coordinator"

Standards and Responsibilities for Chapters: II-C-15

"At no time shall a CHADD Board member engage in behavior that would result in (or create the appearance of) a conflict of interest."

Officers in a non-profit corporation may not run a business off their position.  This means a CHADD officer cannot run a meeting wherein they recruit members into their (e.g.) coaching ('or whatever') business.

But in the document I've seen that their officers sign, there is no prohibition.  You only have to declare the total overall income derived from such a business.  And when you inquire about it you are told by their lawyer:

"..such forms often contain financial and other personal information.."
But there were no questions asking for patient's names or their personal information (nor should there be!) on that form.  Only the overall income derived from them.  Income that is a Conflict of Interest.  Which their lawyer tells you:
"..that CHADD is not in a position to share with the CHADD membership or the public. .."

And then their lawyer prohibits you from telling anyone he has told you this.


"I'm a Coach" boasts "I'm the Coordinator"

"I'm a Coach" was interestingly absent at that small private leadership meeting in the summer of 2002 in San Jose where "Say 'hi' to Clarke Ross for me" instructed us to go along with it all -- and the recruitment started as soon as Lisa left (she never came back), just after Clarke Ross took office.

And then the coaching commercials began.

And continues.  To this day.

As it all just "rolls on".

                      "Say 'hi' to Clarke Ross for me" 

"Where's Lisa?"




"Because it is my Therapy"
(why I'm doing all this)

Autumn 2004

At the Election she was upset with me during lunch sitting next to Mick Terrone as she asked me directly what I expected to accomplish by all this.  I reminded her that she herself had been a witness to it.

So I will tell her "why" lest she miss it again.

Because I was asked such a thing.
Because the list of "because's" has become endless.

Because it is my Therapy.  Because "I can't get it out of my head" and this is the only venue I have left in which to express it.  For I seek answers to questions that go unanswered.  And this is the only place I feel permitted to ask them.

Because I was pleased with Lisa's leadership of our group when I first joined.  And it is as if she has fallen off the face of the earth.  "Where's Lisa?" 

Because I've been involved in the stuttering self-help movement since 1971 and I know what it's all about and it has been denied to me.

Because it is a continual emotional drain.

Because we have a paid membership over 700 ("who knows?" ..) and the Election was attended by NO members not running for office.  Which means there was NO Election Team this time to give us the Election Results. 
And because those who were there that Lew appointed (he got nowhere trying to buy me off with this one the last time) to run for uncontested offices all dutifully just sat there and not one of them dared announce their candidacy against him.

Because another friend told me I made some good points but 'helpfully advised' me not use the word "cult" because it would impair my credibility.  And also has gone silent.  Because I saw a "flash of Integrity" from her that impressed me.  And I fear for her.

Because that "flash of Integrity" whenever I've seen it, is always extinguished.

And the Silence is Deafening.

Because all I've seen for 3 years now are new members that come once, twice and never return.

Because I believe in "truth in labeling" .. because when I bought a can labeled "CHADD" in big exciting letters with a lot of smiling faces holding annual Elections and took it home and opened it, I found something else inside.  Actually, I don't think I found anything inside.

Because I announced my candidacy last April 7 and the membership (over 700) doesn't know who I am.

Because even my candidate's statement (just 15 letters, a single word, "www.mangers.org") was suppressed and never published to the membership. 

Because it flourishes when good men stand by and do nothing.  Because it has now tainted her.  And I fear for another.

Because it is Wrong.

Because she herself saw it and knew it was Wrong.

And because she never answered those questions I emailed to her.

Because I agree with most all I see published and see the names of men I admire and respect.

Because we have difficult issues to argue and need organisations with the "Coin of Integrity" that rings true with the Public.

Because it must be said.  

Because the burden has fallen upon me to do so.

Because no one else can.  And so I must say it.

Because "it is my duty".

Because if I remain silent, the same thing will happen to the next one.

Because it's so easy to dominate, control and silence an Inattentive.
Because I had to learn how to do it from my stuttering therapy and I still hate it.

Because I wish someone else would do it and no one has.

Because it is so easy to play tricks on an Inattentive.
And the Deceptions have become endless.

And because at the Election during lunch, I pulled out a copy of their Bylaws Lew faxed me last year and gave them to Mick Terrone and asked him in front of her if they were authentic? Yes   Are they binding and currently in force? Yes   But then it became something like "no" as I showed him the page with Lew's 2 year term limit in them.  Pointing to it.  A maximum term of office after which he must step down.  Then I got something about how this didn't apply to Chapters.  I told him those words sounded pretty emphatic to me.  Then it was something about our chapter being incorporated as a separate entity not subject to National.  I gather here in Calif.  Which would mean different Bylaws.  Which were never produced. 

But if our Chapter is state incorporated, then why is Mick (i.e. 'National') here?

Because I find myself stumbling around in this fog with more unanswered questions.  And people disappearing back into it.

Because it all just "rolls on" obliviously.

Because I do not seek office but search in vain for a backbone of Integrity from someone.

And because we have all just been taught "the wrong lesson".

And because it's ALL become endless and I wish someone else would do it.
And I hope to finish it before it buries me and be done with it.





"The Air of Familiarity"

  "Say 'hi' to Clarke Ross for me"

I heard it just after our first election.  As did a fully suited and authoritative Mick Terrone that afternoon.  As he walked to his parked car for the airport.  After having just ignored our election team not running for office.  I wonder if he knew she was a Notary Public.  

"My work is over.." I told her afterwards.  

"Oh no..!" she countered as I heard her instructions.  And was gone.  She cancelled out just before the second election.  Had she shown up, she'd have been the election team not running for office again.  A Notary Public is an Officer of the Court .. "sworn in" and all.  She'd have had to witness it all over again.

"Say 'hi' to Clarke Ross for me"
I don't know why I seem to hear in that a faint echo
"Say 'hi' to Paulo Costa for me.." in The Silence of Novartis

'99 -- what happened that year?  The year they all took office.

The year it was 'restructured'.

"maybe it was forever so" -- for there are more unanswered questions.  Met with more Silence.  Cold Silence.  Ignored questions.  Or questions "I am not allowed to ask" -- for I always seem to hear something else dominating the environment. 

 Chatterboxes .. a video player .. a "speaker" .. et. al. ..

Two questions I've never heard at a meeting:
"Who won the Election Cathi?"
"What would you like to know Geoffrey?"
(e.g. a listing of all CHADD capital property in the possession of officers here, their Bylaws require an annual accounting of it to the membership but I've never seen a newsletter since I joined in 2000).

And who were all those new people who came to our meetings?  Come once, twice.  Never return.  People I never seemed to be able to get to know.  "where did they go?" .. "what happened to them?" .. "the bodysnatchers" or something (over 700).

And "Where's Lisa?" (and other former leaders?--*who* are they?) -- an organisation without a History.  Or Bylaws.  Or election history.  Or publication of them.  Or a newsletter here (as that Risograph just 'rusts away').  Or a membership.  Or socials.

What's the annual funding nationally?  Our Board couldnít answer these questions either.

$3 million?--"who knows?" .. where does it all go? .. It's all a Mystery to me.  "Who controls CHADD?"  Silence.  From our election team not running for office.  More Silence.  "the silence is deafening" ..

Amnesia Epidemic
"I don't know anything"


"Turf War"?

My funding questions about Novartis have been raised by what has been discussed publicly in front of me at several meetings last year.  Meetings (after regularly attending for 3 years) I have ceased to attend and quite frankly wish to no longer (for many other reasons).  For "there is no excuse for ANY of it" as it all just "rolls on" obliviously.

"didn't even take the time to get to know who I was"

Autumn 2004




The Silence of Novartis
(Paulo still hasn't responded to my questions)


I'm attempting to open up a communication channel with the controlling arm of Novartis.

And requesting email addresses and contact information for their Board of Directors both Internationally and Domestically.  And their Ethics Committee.

Starting with:
Paulo Costa, Head of the Americas, Novartis Pharmaceuticals Corporation
(who took office the same year as Lew, 1999--the same year of its 'restructuring').

Sorry for the intrusion, Paulo

Thought I'd help Paulo out there..

I wish to know how CHADD has actually been controlled, particularly since their 'restructuring' in '99.  As well as the annual funding History of CHADD since 1987.



The Questions I sent to Gina
(that were never answered)

Sent: Thursday, January 15, 2004 10:06 AM
Subject: You've made quite an impression here.

I will tell you that the little you said (regarding me) at the last CHADD meeting impressed me immensely. 

I was wondering if I might be able to talk to you more at your convenience so that you may impress me further.

Or perhaps you may know of others like yourself who can.

I will have questions like:
How much do you know about CHADD?
How long have you been involved with CHADD and to what level?
How well do you know the leadership?
How much do you know about its History and the nature of how it's controlled and the Evolution of this control?
The actual nature of the training of those involved in running meetings.
The nature of their Elections e.g. has there ever been an 'upset'--(victory by a challenger) in a contested election?
Have Elections *ever* been discussed/promoted in Attention Magazine?
And candidates from the membership encouraged to run for office.
Where can I find a record of all the actual election results at CHADD?
Particularly the attendance of members not running for office.
How communication is controlled with the membership?--remember the membership list must be kept strictly confidential (and properly so).
Control of communication at meetings (you saw it yourself and showed me something *I* didn't know..Impressive!).

Who can I talk to who would be willing to give me honest answers to my questions?
Persons like yourself that strike me of Character and Integrity.

And certainly feel free to ask of me any and all questions you might have about myself.

Impressed indeed!,




To: All you Pacifists
Subject:"angry", eh..

The Chief came down to our meeting to lecture us on "ANGER".
I told him: "So we should never get angry?"
and announced my candidacy against him.




Candidate for Chapter Coordinator of Northern California CHADD.

  I announced my candidacy for Coordinator publicly at our CHADD Palo Alto meeting April 7.  And hope to encourage other members to contest me in the upcoming election.  I've been involved in the stuttering self-help movement since 1971 (see the following).  And involved in the ADD self-help movement for over 3 years now.  Regularly attending both Kitty Petty's meetings as well as the CHADD ones here locally.  I ran for the same office last year in CHADD.   Those who know me, know I have a taste for playful humor, teasing and satire.  It's great if I can do it without my stuttering stomping on that 'punchline'.  And I'll apologise/explain if it goes awry.
  I'm 55 and have been poor most all of my life (as was my father).  I expect a farm-worker has made more in their life than I have.  I've struggled with lifelong self-esteem issues.  My loyalties are to all of those who have struggled with the difficulties I have.  I'm looking forward to meeting many new and fascinating people in this community.




It is a deep voice full of authority that fills the room.

"What was your name again?"

It's the gaveling stamp going down on the documents you file at the Election Commission.  Turning this wimp into Arnold Schwarzenegger announcing his candidacy on the Tonight Show.

And a "rite of passage" in every tribe.



Hanging CHADD's

  CHADD National used to be located in Florida.  Maybe they moved because they didnít want to have to deal with it all again.  Or already knew what to expect.

  I remember the meeting I announced my candidacy.  As this one fellow left at the end of it commenting about "Robert's Rules of Order".  Maybe he was grumbling about it all through that smile or something.  I should have returned his smile reflecting back to all those "hanging chads" we saw on TV (and the rest of it..): "yeah, why did they even bother with it all .. just leave Bill Clinton in office for another 4 years.."





The CHADD Election (2004)

(Which was indeed held "Saturday, June 19, 2004, from Noon to 3 pm, at the Epworth United Methodist Church, Berkeley, CA.")

The results I wrote down that Mick Terrone gave us:

Lew: 14  ALL running for uncontested offices 
  (to which I expect they were all probably appointed to by Lew)
except for Lew of course who I again contested 
and one unknown proxy: about a third of those on the ballot never even showed up for their own election.

Geoffrey (me): 1 (I voted for myself this year instead of Lew)

The Election Results from our "Election Team not running for office" do not exist.  There are no election results.  For there was NO attendence by anyone not running for office (with a secret paid membership of over 700).  

And again no Election Bylaws were produced: "The maximum term of office for a Coordinator is 2 consecutive years.  After this time the Coordinator must step down"  (and I learned during lunch that Mick Terrone himself knows it -- and it was witnessed that he knows it).

Lew's term in office expired on Nov 6, 2001.  And no one was ever told this.
Which means CHADD is no longer controlled by its Bylaws OR the membership -- "Was it ever?"

        "Who does control CHADD?"




My comments on the whole Election (2004):

Well, "I did my duty".
I don't know, seems the only way to get to know some more of our members is to run for Lew's office every year.  Wish they'd have some Bay Area socials sometime.

I announced my candidacy against Lew last April 7.  

So two months later, when (a week before the election) Lew asked me for a candidate's statement in 500 words or less, I gave him my website election campaign address: www.mangers.org -- that's 13 letters and 2 periods.  I believe in concision.  It wasn't acceptable.  Lew refused to publish it as my candidate's statement.  Mick Terrone followed with an email telling me the only communication with the membership they were going to provide me with was my 3 minutes at the Election itself.

I gave Mick a piece of my mind on this issue.

Website addresses of candidates are published along with their candidate's statements to the electorate in ALL elections: http://www.voterguide.ss.ca.gov/cand/cand.html

Gina and Lew were allowed to have their candidate's statements published (email) to the membership (about 700?) but I wasn't permitted to publish mine: just 13 letters and 2 periods.

In fact, I asked Lew at the Election itself if he had published my website to the membership.  "No" he said.

Most of those present were new to me and knew absolutely nothing about me.  One asked me to tell her about myself.  She was very sweet and curious to know who I was.  I tried to explain to her that it would be impossible for me to do so in the 3 minutes I was allowed and gave her my website address.  Explaining she'd have to learn about me after the Election.  I tried to give her a bit about my background as best I could in the brief time I had.

No one knew who I was.  Why should any of them have voted for me?  They all voted against me.  I don't blame them.

Furthermore, names were required on the Ballots this time.  This is how you "keep people in line".  There's no excuse for this.  Ballots cast by those present at Elections should always be kept secret. 

Lew: 14
Me: 1 (I voted for myself instead of Lew this time)
And there was 1 proxy ballot (I don't know who).
Well, at least I know how many votes we all got this time.

Attendance of about 14 or so.  All running for office.
How do you create "an Election Team not running for office" from that?

Our Notary Public (last year's Election Team was supposed to attend--we'd have had an Election Team, she's not running for office).  But she cancelled out.  As a Notary, maybe she didn't want to have to witness it all again.  

They all seemed pleasant.  I don't know why Gina seemed upset.  I like Gina.  Earlier I had told Lew she'd be acceptable to me to help run the election.  Maybe that's why she was annoyed.  She wound up on the "Election Team".  She was running for office (no one showed up who wasn't).  This time *she* had to do it.  Instead of our Notary Public.

I quickly skimmed over Judy's financial report.  It all looks like "small potatoes" from here.  I think Judy's getting comfortable with me.  Most people are, if they're allowed to get to know me.

Anyway, I'm planning on moving on with my life so I'm moving my CHADD related items from www.mangers.org over to this website.  But I want to leave a record of my experiences so everyone will know why I had to run.  I've "done my duty".

I'll let someone else figure out that CHADD "puzzle box".  How it's really controlled, those Bylaws ("whatever they are") and "what it is"--it's probably just some big "infomercial" or something.  It all just "rolls on".  We all do.  Why am I wasting my time with it all?  Maybe those 700+ paid members felt the same way.  They come once, twice, never return.  Maybe they're all wondering why I haven't figured it all out yet.  Maybe they're all thinking "why's this idiot wasted 3 years of his life tilting at that lonely windmill trying to meet us when we're all over here?" .. "HELLO OVER THERE!" .. "can you hear us?" -- the thing is I can't .. where the hell *are* all of you?







"I don't know what to say anymore.."

(I know I've been guilty of it myself on occasion so who am I to complain, eh?)

There were 3, a woman and a couple (of the 7 attending the meeting).  The husband gestured to us all how he'd spank any of his children who got out of line.  All 3 chatterboxes went at it with each other for almost the whole meeting.  I wanted to get to know them better.  But somehow I never did.  No attendance was taken.

I went out to my car to get my Uncle Sam hat with 'Elections' on it and walked back in the meeting wearing it.  It didn't matter, they just kept going with themselves.  Then at the end..  "Oh dear, look at the time, we must be going, the sitter is waiting.."  I just didn't know what to say to them.

I just wish we could have somehow gotten around to talking about those Elections.  I tried to bring up the subject to no avail.  I still don't know what's going on.  Is anyone contesting me?  Or being encouraged to?  Has my candidacy been publicised to the (Confidential and properly so) hidden membership yet?  Where *is* the membership anyway?  Does anyone know what's going on?

"Inattentive": we miss it all the time as we wait patiently for our turn that never comes..  Like our Election Team did last July 12 and continues to be.  She was the only voting member not running for office attending the Election.  She's a mobile notary public.  Why doesn't someone call her up and ask her to drive over with those Election results?  In fact, she was at the meeting.  Somehow no one ever discovered this either.  The Chatterbox meeting.  With our Election Team.

The Incumbents ran the last Election.  Are they running the present one?  Who are they?

Anyone seen any Bylaws?  Are there any?

"I just don't know what to say anymore.."




      Thanks to all my supporters.